A Fool and His Money in Week 17

It’s craziness in Week 17. Will the playoff teams even bother to start their studs? Will the backups be decent when they get in there?

We can attempt to negotiate through the darkness of the last week of the season, but in reality, we’ll just be happy to be at .500 for the season with this week’s picks.

Oakland Raiders at Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Raiders (+13) over BUCS
Crazy things happen in the final week of the regular season. If we knew which Oakland team was going to show up, 13 points would be perfect. Will it be the one that has a decent defense and running game or the team that just plain sucks all around?

Cleveland Browns at Pittsburgh Steelers

STEELERS (-10.5) over Browns
Normally, I would expect starters to rest for a team that has secured a bye and has nothing to play for, but Mike Tomlin insists that the Steelers are “playing to win.” If that’s truly the case, I expect the Steelers to easily win by double digits.

Tennessee Titans at Indianapolis Colts

Titans (-3) over COLTS
Both of these teams have already secured their playoff seeds. The Colts have not been particularly good at home this year, and Jeff Fisher says the Titans will play to win while Tony Dungy has been mum on the subject. Even if they both tried all out to win, I still like the Titans by a field goal in this one.

St. Louis Rams at Atlanta Falcons

Rams (+14.5) over FALCONS
I loved picking the Falcons this year, especially when they were getting points and playing teams with inferior records. But alas, it appears those days are gone. I can’t refuse taking 14.5 points in an NFL game.

New England Patriots at Buffalo Bills

Patriots (-6.5) over BILLS $
The Patriots are looking good right now, and there is playoff spot on the line. What does that mean? It means Belichick pulls no punches and rips into the Bills. I hope the Patriots make the playoffs over Miami because they are playing a lot better right now than they were earlier in the season.

Detroit Lions at Green Bay Packers

Lions (+10) over PACKERS
This is a pity pick for the woeful Lions. This is your last chance to avoid history. Good luck.

Chicago Bears at Houston Texans

TEXANS (-2.5) over Bears
The Texans get on a nice little roll, and then what happens? They lose by double digits to the Raiders. I honestly believe this Texans team just doesn’t know how to be winners as an organization or as a team. They are full of players who weren’t dynamic winners or leaders in college. If only they had drafted Vince Young … I will never forgive them for this mistake.

Kansas City Chiefs at Cincinnati Bengals

Chiefs (+3) over BENGALS
Watch out, the Bengals are on a winning streak! Haha, that just sounds funny. I’m taking the Chiefs because they have looked decent every week recently and because Tony Gonzalez helped lead my fantasy team to the championship! Suck on that, Jacob!

New York Giants at Minnesota Vikings

VIKINGS (+6.5) over Giants
If the Giants try, they will wipe the floor with this Vikings team, but I don’t think they are going to try very hard. The Vikings are at home with playoffs beginning a week early for them. I should at least take them with the points.

Carolina Panthers at New Orleans Saints

SAINTS (+3) over Panthers
The NFC South teams are just plain sick at home, and I don’t see the Panthers being particularly motivated after losing the No. 1 seed in overtime last week.

Washington Redskins at San Francisco 49ers

Redskins (-3) over 49ERS
I don’t care about this game at all. I’ve already written too much.

Jacksonville Jaguars at Baltimore Ravens

RAVENS (-12.5) over Jaguars
I don’t like giving away so many points, but I like this Ravens team. I think the Ravens will rise under pressure with a playoff berth on the line.

Seattle Seahawks at Arizona Cardinals

CARDINALS (-6) over Seahawks
Do you smell that? That is the Cardinals stinking up the joint the past three weeks. They better get their mojo going in a hurry if they don’t want to be a sacrificial lamb in the first round of the playoffs. Luckily, playing the Seahawks at home can inspire a lot of false confidence.

Dallas Cowboys at Philadelphia Eagles

EAGLES (-1.5) over Cowboys
This is purely a pick out of hate. I hate the Cowboys. I’m going to ignore the fact that the Eagles lost to the Redskins last week and only scored three points.

Miami Dolphins at New York Jets

JETS (-2.5) over Dolphins
This will be one of the most intriguing games of the week. The Jets have looked horrible the past four weeks and went 1-3 in that span. Brett Favre did somehow get a Pro Bowl spot over a much more worthy Philip Rivers, so maybe he’ll prove why in this game. This week would also make for a nice revenge game from Pennington if he can come into the Meadowlands and take a playoff spot right in front of his former team.

Denver Broncos at San Diego Chargers

CHARGERS (-8.5) over Broncos
Wow. Who would have seen the Chargers coming back to win the division? A Chargers-Colts rematch in the first round would be insane, but first, they have to get past the floundering Broncos. I’m guessing the Chargers dominate this game right from the beginning. Philip Rivers is the man. I traded Donovan McNabb and Marques Colston to get him in my fantasy league five or six weeks ago, and it worked out brilliantly. He gave me 35 points in my championship, and I pulled off an upset to win for our traveling trophy. My first three picks next year will be Philip Rivers, Michael Turner and Tony Gonzalez. I’m not joking either; those guys are my heroes.

Current Standings after Week 16:

Nick: 116-113-6
Nick’s Locks: 9-9-1

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