Week 8 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: L.T. is a zombie

At some point, we have to stop framing recommendations to start LaDainian Tomlinson with stats from his past performances. “For his career, L.T. averages 100+ yards and bazillion touchdowns against (fill in the blank).” No crap. L.T. was a dominant fantasy force up until last season, but how much suck did L.T. average just last…… Continue reading Week 8 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: L.T. is a zombie

Week 7 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: LenWhale fall down, go boom

Patrick Crayton just straight up offended me by complaining that he wasn’t told that he was being replaced in the starting lineup. Seriously? But seriously? But seriously? I guess he was the last to know. I knew two weeks ago. Let’s just drop the act, Crayton. You saw Miles Austin have the best day of…… Continue reading Week 7 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: LenWhale fall down, go boom

Week 6 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: A Week Without Peyton Manning

I once heard that Peyton Manning can hear us think our own thoughts. In the huddle, he thinks so hard that the middle linebacker opposing him get headaches. Headaches lead to fear; fear leads to anger; anger leads to hate; and hate leads to Manning’s audible at the line that allows his laser-sighted, rocket arm…… Continue reading Week 6 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: A Week Without Peyton Manning

Week 5 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: Pretty please, Braylon. Pretty Please.

I watched the UFL game last night, and it wasn’t even like the accidentally-left-it-on-that-channel kind of watch. I actually watched it. It was far more interesting than watching Missouri spank Nebraska in the rain. J.P. Losman led the Las Vegas Locomotives, an engine of destruction, I’m told, to a come-from-behind victory against the California Redwoods,…… Continue reading Week 5 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: Pretty please, Braylon. Pretty Please.

Week 4 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: Rookie of the Year?

Chadam of contributing writer to Fantasy Football Fools fame has this theory about Chad Pennington that he asked me to share. He says they broke Pennington’s shoulder on purpose so that he can have surgery and come back next season like Rookie of the Year with a cannon that can throw 70-yard bombs. Maybe he’s…… Continue reading Week 4 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: Rookie of the Year?

Week 3 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: Why worry?

http://youtu.be/fLes1MufRf8 You don’t want to be Mr. Worry. For one, that wrinkled forehead will be stuck that way forever. And two, he carries a purse. So back down from that ledge there. Pause a second before you put on that lipstick and trace over the names of your fantasy studs turned duds. They turned on…… Continue reading Week 3 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: Why worry?

Week 1 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: The “Are we there yet?” Edition

The kickoff cometh! In just a few hours, the NFL will return to that magic box in my living room and all will be right with the world. In the meantime, it’s time to make sure you’ve got your best fantasy football roster forward. Much like our waiver wire recommendations have been shortened up to…… Continue reading Week 1 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: The “Are we there yet?” Edition