Here comes the live blog. Join us for some foolish commentary on the 2013 NFL draft. We’ll get things going just before Eric Fisher takes the stage.
That concludes our live blogging. Thanks for foolishly following along.
Thanks to reactiongifsarchive.imgur.com for all the GIFs.
No Te’o in the entire first round?
Not bad, Ravens. Not a bad way to beef up at safety.
R1P32: Baltimore Ravens select FS Matt Elam
Not exactly what I had in mind.
R1P31: Dallas Cowboys (trade) select C Travis Frederick
FINALLY THE COWBOYS GET TO MAKE A PICK!
Rams get some more punch on defense, which isn’t as exciting for fantasy but good nonetheless.
R1P30: St. Louis Rams (trade) select LB Alec Ogletree
Little did you know, Deion Sanders runs a Rent-a-Swag outside of the NFL Draft, which is where Cordarrelle Patterson got his outfit.
Another fantasy relevant pick! The Vikings take possibly the second most talented receiver in the draft after Tavon Austin. Keep your eye on this guy. Vikings need him to emerge.
R1P29: Minnesota Vikings (trade) select Cordarrelle Patterson
And the Patriots…trade. Again?!
Are the Vikings trying to draft Herschel Walker?
Broncos get a little help on defense to improve the side of the ball Peyton Manning doesn’t orchestrate. Looks like a strong pick if he emerges in the NFL.
R1P28: Denver Broncos select DT Sylvester Williams
So after all the talk of Tennessee receivers, neither looks like they’ll go in the first round…
Hopkins is a big guy who, according to NFL Network, plays like Roddy White. Can’t hurt to have someone like that on the roster as they’ll be looking to replace Andre Johnson’s role in a few years.
R1P27: Houston Texans select WR DeAndre Hopkins
Packers disappoint all fantasy football players by choosing Jones over Eddie Lacy, but they did need help on defense.
R1P26: Green Bay Packers select DE Datone Jones
No receivers and no Te’o. Vikings…I am disappointed.
R1P25: Minnesota Vikings (trade) select CB Xavier Rhodes
Mayock: “He does everything really well, but nothing great.” Get excited with that sales pitch.
But sure, he’ll be a weapon for the Colts D, which needs all the help it can get.
R1P24: Indianapolis Colts select DE Bjoern Werner
Sharrif finally comes off the board after everyone talked up his fall and his character concerns. The Vikings should be pretty mean on D this season if Floyd lives up to expectations.
R1P23: Minnesota Vikings select DT Sharrif Floyd
Trufant should be an asset for Atlanta. They do have to play Drew Brees twice every season. Celebrate, Falcons.
R1P22: Atlanta Falcons (double trade) select CB Desmond Trufant
R1P21: Cincinnati Bengals select TE Tyler Eifert
Yay! Another team trying to use two tight ends! In all honesty, there may be some fantasy relevance here…but we’ll see how much.
R1P20: Chicago Bears select OG Kyle Long
So many fatties going in the first round this year. Long immediately helps the Bears by keeping Jay Cutler from getting sacked. Maybe Cutler won’t have to move like this in the pocket this season.
How does Cutler feel about this? I would guess something like this…
The Giants get a better offensive line, even if he does have T-Rex arms.
R1P19: New York Giants select OT Justin Pugh
R1P18: San Francisco 49ers (trade) select FS Eric Reid
Great fit for 49ers since they needed to fill the spot Dashon Goldson just vacated.
And the Dallas Cowboys trade down…
He’s a baller with a tremendous motor…whatever that means.
R1P17: Pittsburgh Steelers select OLB Jarvis Jones
Leon Sandcastle just went all Barbara Walters on E.J. Manuel
Enjoy that, as Mayock says, “piece of clay,” Buffalo!
R1P16: Buffalo Bills (trade) select QB E.J. Manuel
I had my complaints about Kenny when he was playing for my Longhorns, but you have to give him credit as the most versatile safety in this draft. He did some good work against Tavon Austin, and he’s a solid pick for the Saints.
R1P15: New Orleans Saints select SS Kenny Vaccaro.
No heart problems here. Carolina gets some help on defense.
R1P14: Carolina Panthers select DT Star Lotulelei
Sharrif Floyd continues his descent, and the Jets fans no happy.
Not very exciting. I’ll say that much. Geno would have warranted a better GIF.
R1P13: New York Jets (trade) select DT Sheldon Richardson.
Geno Smith might have missed one of his last chances to be drafted in the first round. We might be in store for a lot of sad/bored Geno face the rest of tonight.
After his near-death experience, they rebuilt him. He’s a terminator now. You have been warned.
Not a bad Raiders’ pick after they traded down.
R1P12: Oakland Raiders (trade) select CB D.J. Hayden
The stage is going to collapse if this many big guys go all at first, right?
R1P11: San Diego Chargers select OT D.J. Fluker
I secretly hoped he would fall to the Cowboys, but can’t fault the Titans for choosing Chance Warmack.
Mike Mayock: “I told you six fatties would go in the top 12.”
R1P10: Tennessee Titans select OG Chance Warmack
But the important thing, Jets, is that you tried so hard. I would not want to be Dee Milliner this season.
And now we watch the Jets’ experiment try to replace Revis with Dee Milliner. Get ready.
R1P9: New York Jets select CB Dee Milliner
The Rams select Tavon Austin. This draft just became fantasy relevant!
R1P8: St. Louis Rams (trade) select WR Tavon Austin
The Bills had a chance to pick up the QB of their choice here at No. 8. Instead, they trade down.
For those of you following at home, I may live blog the rest of the draft with only GIFs.
Uh oh, Rams trade up. Will this be Tavon Austin? Me thinks so.
Jonathan Cooper and his natural “bending” skills go to Arizona.
R1P7: Arizona Cardinals select OG Jonathan Cooper
The blog’s spellchecking is going to hate this pick: Barkevious Mingo.
R1P6: Cleveland Browns select DE Barkevious Mingo
Kudos to BYU’s basketball team for cutting Ansah twice, forcing him to play football…and now be drafted by the NFL in the first round
R1P5: Detroit Lions select DE Ziggy Ansah
It’s official. No NFL wife/girlfriend will ever top Russell Wilson’s wife’s reaction to his selection.
R1P4: Philadelphia Eagles select OT Lane Johnson.
Jeff Ireland might have just upset Chip Kelly’s first Round 1 draft pick selection.
Dion Jordan is taking his talents to South Beach.
R1P3: Miami Dolphins (trade) select DE Dion Jordan.
Did that old dude on the phone just say “trade” when he mouthed to the other Raiders’ phone man? I think so.
So it appears to be really good luck to draft right after the Raiders. Ouch.
Really? I think he’d really get into the Mr. Hyde. “NOW THIS JOKER, I LIKE!”
No way Gruden actually read Dr. Jekyll and Mr Hyde
Translating Mayock: Now Blaine Gabbert has no excuses.
The Jaguars just drafted a 13-year-old kid to play left tackle.
R1P2: Jacksonville Jaguars select OT Luke Joeckel.
We are going to be waiting a while for a pick that will actually translate into a fantasy football draft pick
No. I’m pretty sure the Jaguars want to skip this pick.
If they skipped the Jaguars pick, would anyone notice? Or care?
I think they’re saving it all for the Jets’ pick. Or Rex Ryan is waiting in the crowd to lead the booing.
Why isn’t the New York crowd booing more? I thought they boo everyone
Instead of a jersey, the Chiefs will be giving Fisher a Hawaiian shirt with his name on it.
R1P1: Kansas City Chiefs select Eric Fisher.
I’m glad Kansas City is using their entire clock for this decision. Its the only time we will focus on them for more than the time it takes for a JC25 highlight
Oh, we’re killing so much time here that Mayock is talking up Andy Reid’s choice of shirt. Exciting!
Personally, I’m glad they aren’t tipping picks this year. That was such a buzzkill.
Andy Reid dressed himself today, everyone.
Did Joe Namath just wander onto the stage? Or was that planned? We might never know.
Welcome the Fantasy Football Fools’ 2013 NFL Draft Live blog.
We’ll be here throughout the first round to keep you entertained.